WHY SHOULD WE ADVOCATE FOR FAMILY BASED CARE RATHER THAN INSTITUTIONALISED CARE?

Buds of Christ was one among the organisations in the region to recognise that the emotional, social and cultural needs of children are as important as their material needs. As a result, since the inception of Buds of Christ we have advocated care of orphaned children in their families rather than institutionalized care arrangements.

Over time we began to realise that, although this policy was being advocated and promoted in principle, the main focus and concern for community members, volunteers and many programme staff has been material needs. This is only natural and has become more pressing as the economic and material situation of communities has deteriorated. We have also noted that these communities are feeling totally overwhelmed with their situation and feeling powerless to support the many children affected by HIV and AIDS in their villages. Many field workers and volunteers report feeling embarrassed to turn up at the households of vulnerable children “empty-handed” and sometimes do not visit these children because they feel they have nothing to offer.

Feedback from the children and young people in the communities, especially from the very young children, however, served to remind us and re-emphasise the fact that, even in times of real material hardship, the “invisible” psychosocial support offered to children by their neighbours makes a real difference to them and that this is valued as much, if not more, than the material support being offered. Communities often do not recognise the impact that gestures of care and love make on children.

It is necessary, therefore, to provide a framework in which we could ensure that psychosocial aspects of our work are given the value and emphasis they deserve and to demonstrate to community members that much of the support that orphaned and vulnerable children need does not cost anything and uses the resources that communities have in abundance.

We also recognise that many vulnerable children, because of their experiences, are not easy to live with and to support. The behaviour that they exhibit, as a result of their grief and trauma, can make children unresponsive and apparently ungrateful for the enormous efforts community members make to support and protect them.

Class 12 - Achievers of Buds of Christ surpassing all obstacles

This year, 9 children at Buds of Christ appeared and all have cleared their 12^th exams successfully, despite all challenges and obstacles that they face due to HIV, stigma and poverty. Out of 9 children who had appeared for 12^th standard, 7 children are under the care of widowed mothers living with HIV, one child has lost both parents to HIV. 3 children of widowed mothers have scored more than 1000 marks.

All these mothers have not even completed their 10^th standard and belong to very low income status. The children and the mothers have battled the pressures from relatives and well wishers who often force young girls from such families to be married early or even suggest dropping from school and engage in cheap child labour.

For instance in the case of Menaka, 17 years old she has scored 1028/1200 in her 12^th this year. She aspires to become an agricultural scientist. She is living with her widowed mother (living with HIV) who has not passed even her 10^th standard. Her mother was very keen that Menaka should study further and live life independently.

Menaka’s mother expressed ”I do not want to make the same mistake my parents made. As soon as I attained puberty, I was only 15 years then, they got me married to a lorry driver and in 5 years of marriage he passed away, leaving three of us alone. It was hard for me to get a good job and income, as I had not completed my 10^th standard. Later because of my HIV status, I was given a job as a peer counselor in a community based network and while working, I registered myself for studying through Open University and now I am a graduate. I now work as a peer counselor at a Government Institution. I have experienced the value of education and have always encouraged my daughter to study as long as she wants. Though I have faced pressured from relatives to have my daughter married, I have not heeded. I want my daughter to live her dream and will do all my best for her”.

Each of the children at Buds of Christ has an inspiring story of overcoming challenges of life. Nothing is impossible for those who have DREAMS and believe in their dreams. Children at Buds of Christ are examples for that. All that we did at Buds of Christ was to support children like Menaka towards their school education. You too can make a difference in the lives of children by extending your hand of support to us!